How to introduce yourself
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Thank you.
Hello, my name is Kevin Bahler.
I am the grant writer for Allentown Symphony Association.
I always find that a strange way to introduce myself.
It’s not that I don’t like my job – I’m very proud of it – but why is that our only introduction?
When I was five, I have lots of introductions.
“Hi! My name is Kevin, and my favorite color is green.”
“Hi! My name is Kevin, and I have a cat named Tiger.”
“Hi! My name is Kevin, and I love finger-painting!”
Admittedly, that last one was kind of playing it safe because, let’s be honest, who doesn’t love finger-painting?
But I didn’t pick it because it was safe, I picked it because I was always honest and upfront about who I was and what I loved.
When I was in elementary school, I changed my introductions to match my newest interests.
“Hi, my name is Kevin, and I like watching Power Rangers.”
“Hi, my name is Kevin, and I do the martial art Aikido.”
“Hi, my name is Kevin, and my favorite food is quiche.”
Yes, I was a very weird boy, and I admit it.
But there reaches an age when being honest and open about yourself is the social equivalent of getting “kick me” tattooed across your forehead.
So as I got older, I slowly picked the safer options.
By the time I was in high school, I had changed my introductions to match what was normal.
“Hey, I’m Kevin, and I like watching The Simpsons.”
“Hey, I’m Kevin, and I like eating corn-pops.”
I didn’t even tell people I did martial arts.
And it’s not I ever lied about myself, I just told people the parts of me they expected to hear.
How come?
Well, in case you don’t remember high school very well, you need to fit in.
And whether you want to fit in with the popular kids or if you want to fit in with a counterculture, If you want to have any friends, you need to have something in common with somebody.
And the safer your introduction, the more likely you are to connect.
So I figured out how to say the right things and I survived high school without being ostracized as a “quiche-gobbling wannabe Ninja,” and that was a victory. But when graduation day came, I was so excited for college.
This was a place where people paid the money to learn.
It had to be filled with incredibly passionate people, right?
Yeah, guess how wrong I was; I’ll give you a hint.
It was a lot.
It turns out that passionate or not, everybody on campus had one introduction.
“Hey, I’m Kevin, and my major is …,” and nobody cared what your major was.
It was just the only allowable introduction.
But you know why?
Because everybody had one.
It was this way to kind of define yourself, but always within the safety of the established programs.
I have to admit: I have not always been the charming, charismatic, sharp-dressed man you see before you.
In fact, I used to be a huge nerd that would do anything to have friends.
So when I was in college, I mastered the safe introduction, and I mastered the safe conversation, and I mastered the safe friendship.
And you know what?
Safe friends are boring!
We didn’t do anything.
We sat in our dorms, complained about teachers and homework, and that was ‘hanging out.’
By the time I was in junior year, I had more ‘friends’ than I had time to spend with them.
And I wasn’t even enjoying myself.
When I realized this, it pushed me over the tipping point, and I finally stopped caring about fitting in, and I started caring about being happy.
So instead of being safe, I started being honest.
“Hi, I’m Kevin, and I’m fascinated by chemistry and physics.”
“Hi, my name is Kevin, and my favorite band ever is Muse.”
“Hi, my name is Kevin, and I love finger-painting!”
You don’t grow out of it, you don’t.
And the funny thing about allowing myself to just be me is that all those boring people stopped wanting to hang out with me because I wasn’t safe.
And all the people who stuck around were awesome!
These were people who did things: we hiked, we swam, we practiced martial arts together, we could discuss anything from black holes to stand up comedians, from Wittgenstein to Winnie The Pooh, and all the while, we were laughing.
And it is so easy to get lost in having a good time.
So I made sure to remind myself of one simple fact: I would never have my true friends if I wasn’t willing to be rejected by everybody else.
So when I graduated college, I was ready to enter the real world.
I’d learned to let go of the safety of conformity, and I was ready to meet other self-actualized adults.
And guess how many I met.
Yeah, about the same as you.
It turns out that it was just the same introduction from college, only now, with wore a suit, or more often, a name tag.
“Hello, my name is meaningless, and I am my job.”
Now, like I said at the beginning, I am proud of my job.
I’m privileged to be able to earn my living by raising money for the symphony; but when I was nine, I never introduced myself by saying, “Hi, my name is Kevin, and when I grow up, I want to be a grant writer.”
I wasn’t that weird of a kid.
And even today, as an adult, there are things that I’m far more passionate about than mailing out project budgets and annual reports.
And passion is what this is really about.
I find it so mind-blowing that so many people have so many passions and so badly want to share them with the world, but they don’t for fear of being criticized by people they don’t even care about.
I’ll talk about my passion with anybody: some crowd at a party, the woman in line at the grocery store, and you there in the back, whoever, because, if some stranger doesn’t think old kung fu movies are totally awesome, so what?
I’m probably never going to see them again, and it doesn’t make me love them any less.
But if that person is totally into “The 36th Chamber of Shaolin,” then I just made a new best friend.
So no matter what, I win.
And so can you.
The ultimate question here is how do you introduce yourself?
That’s tricky.
You know me pretty well by now, but I’ve a good eight minutes to tell you who I am.
How do you convey all of that in a single sentence And that’s something you have to figure out for yourself, and I challenge you to do it.
But I know that it helps to have an example to inspire you so allow me to close with my introduction, “Hello, my name is Kevin Bahler, and I love it when people are truly happy. Thank you
⚡ Learning goals
- Introduce yourself beyond job titles in one honest sentence.
- State passions and interests to build authentic connections.
- Contrast ‘safe’ versus ‘authentic’ introductions in conversation.
✨ Key language
- I’m fascinated by … “I’m fascinated by chemistry and physics.”
- I love … “I love finger-painting!”
- If you want to …, you need to … “If you want to fit in, you need to have something in common.”
⚙️ Rules & Grammar — 4 Structures
1️⃣ Present simple for self‑description
Rule: Use the present simple to express general truths and identity statements.
Examples: I love finger‑painting.; I am a grant writer.; I like watching The Simpsons.
Common pitfall + fix: Using present continuous for habits — Prefer present simple for routines.
Which tense fits: “I ___ honest about who I am.”
Tip: Identity statements usually use present simple.
Fill with the best answer: I ___ finger‑painting.
Tip: Use base form after “I”.
2️⃣ Past simple for personal anecdotes
Rule: Use the past simple to narrate completed events in the past.
Examples: I changed my introductions.; I survived high school.; I graduated college.
Common pitfall + fix: Overusing present for stories — Anchor events in the past.
Choose the best: “I ___ my introductions in high school.”
Tip: Completed past actions use past simple.
Fill with the best answer: He ___ high school without being ostracized.
Tip: Use past simple for finished events.
3️⃣ Conditionals with “if”
Rule: Use “if” to express conditions and their results.
Examples: If you want to fit in, you need to have something in common.; If a stranger disagrees, so what?
Common pitfall + fix: Using future after “if” — Keep present forms in real conditions.
If you want friends, you ___ with others.
Tip: Real conditions use present + present.
Fill with the best answer: If someone disagrees, ___?
Tip: Use the speaker’s phrase from the talk.
4️⃣ Modals of necessity: need to / have to
Rule: Use “need to / have to” to express necessity or obligation.
Examples: You need to fit in.; People had to define themselves by majors.
Common pitfall + fix: Using bare infinitive after “to” — Keep the base verb form.
Choose the best: “You ___ be honest to make real friends.”
Tip: Use “have to” + base verb.
Fill with the best answer: We ___ share our passions.
Tip: Match the modal from the talk.
✍️ Vocabulary
authenticity
Meaning: being true to one’s own personality or character.
Synonyms: genuineness, sincerity, honesty.
Chunk/Idiom: stay authentic.
Example: He values authenticity at work.
Morphology: noun.
Self-practice: Say three things that show authenticity.
fit in
Meaning: be accepted as part of a group.
Synonyms: belong, assimilate, blend.
Chunk/Idiom: try to fit in.
Example: He tried to fit in at college.
Morphology: verb.
Self-practice: Write when you felt you fit in.
counterculture
Meaning: group with values opposing the mainstream.
Synonyms: subculture, alternative, anti-establishment.
Chunk/Idiom: join a counterculture.
Example: They joined a creative counterculture.
Morphology: noun.
Self-practice: Name a counterculture you know.
ostracized
Meaning: excluded from a group.
Synonyms: shunned, rejected, isolated.
Chunk/Idiom: feel ostracized.
Example: He felt ostracized in high school.
Morphology: adj..
Self-practice: Rewrite a time you felt ostracized.
passion
Meaning: strong enthusiasm or desire.
Synonyms: enthusiasm, zeal, fervor.
Chunk/Idiom: share your passion.
Example: She shares her passion for music.
Morphology: noun.
Self-practice: List two passions honestly.
name tag
Meaning: badge displaying a person’s name.
Synonyms: badge, label, ID.
Chunk/Idiom: wear a name tag.
Example: He wore a name tag at work.
Morphology: noun.
Self-practice: Describe an event with name tags.
☁️ Examples (+ audio)
I’m Kevin, and I love exploring old kung fu movies. Safe introductions make shallow connections with people. Share your passions even if some people disagree. I used to hide interests to fit in.
✏️ Exercises
Grammar
Identity statements usually use which tense?
Tip: Think of “I am” and “I love”.
Which word introduces a real condition in the talk?
Tip: He says “If you want to fit in…”.
Fill with the best answer:
On campus, everyone talked about their ______.
Tip: It’s the standard college introduction.
Fill with the best answer:
Many students try to ______ at school.
Tip: Two words; means “belong”.
Vocabulary & Comprehension
Which introduction builds stronger connections?
Tip: Share passions, not titles.
How does he describe ‘safe friends’?
Tip: He says they didn’t do anything.
Fill with the best answer:
He shares his ______ with anyone.
Tip: It’s stronger than “interest”.
Fill with the best answer:
At events, he often wore a ______.
Tip: Two words; worn on your chest.
✅ Guided practice
Mini-dialogue:
A: I’m Jamie, and I’m fascinated by classic cinema.
B: Nice! I’m Pat, and I love hiking and drawing.
A: Let’s skip job titles and talk passions.
Why this matters:
Honest introductions create real connections. They help others remember you. They invite meaningful conversation.
Verb & Adjective Pack:
share — Share your passion with confidence.
belong — We belong when we’re authentic.
reject — Some may reject you; it’s fine.
authentic — Keep your voice authentic.
passionate — Be passionate when you speak.
Try & compare:
Fill with the best answer: I _____ discussing old kung fu movies.
Tip: Use a present simple verb + gerund.
Self-correction: Fix the sentence: I stop hide my real interests.
Tip: Use past simple and correct verb form.
Practice aloud: Listen, repeat, then type the sentence.
If you want to fit in, share your passions.
Tip: Remember the conditional pattern: if + present, present.