How to introduce yourself
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Hello, my name is Kevin Bahler. I am the grant writer for Allentown Symphony Association. I always find that a strange way to introduce myself. It is not that I do not like my job – I am very proud of it – but why is that our only introduction?
When I was five, I had lots of introductions. “Hi! My name is Kevin, and my favorite color is green.” “Hi! My name is Kevin, and I have a cat named Tiger.” “Hi! My name is Kevin, and I love finger-painting!” I picked those because I was honest and upfront about who I was and what I loved.
When I was in elementary school, I changed my introductions to match my newest interests. “Hi, my name is Kevin, and I like watching Power Rangers.” “Hi, my name is Kevin, and I do the martial art Aikido.” “Hi, my name is Kevin, and my favorite food is quiche.” Yes, I was a very weird boy, and I admit it.
But there reaches an age when being honest and open about yourself is the social equivalent of getting “kick me” tattooed across your forehead. As I got older, I picked the safer options. By the time I was in high school, I had changed my introductions to match what was normal. “Hey, I am Kevin, and I like watching The Simpsons.” “Hey, I am Kevin, and I like eating corn-pops.”
I did not even tell people I did martial arts. It is not that I ever lied about myself, I just told people the parts of me they expected to hear. In high school, you need to fit in. Whether you want to fit in with the popular kids or with a counterculture, you need something in common with somebody, and the safer your introduction, the more likely you are to connect.
I figured out how to say the right things and I survived high school without being ostracized as a “quiche-gobbling wannabe ninja,” and that was a victory. When graduation day came, I was excited for college, a place where people paid money to learn. I thought it would be filled with incredibly passionate people.
It turns out that passionate or not, everybody on campus had one introduction: “Hey, I am Kevin, and my major is …” Nobody cared what your major was. It was just the only allowable introduction, a way to define yourself within the safety of established programs. I was a huge nerd who would do anything to have friends, so I mastered the safe introduction, safe conversation and safe friendship.
Safe friends are boring. We sat in our dorms, complained about teachers and homework, and that was hanging out. By junior year, I had more friends than I had time to spend with them, and I was not even enjoying myself. When I realised this, it pushed me over the tipping point. I stopped caring about fitting in and started caring about being happy.
Instead of being safe, I started being honest. “Hi, I am Kevin, and I am fascinated by chemistry and physics.” “Hi, my name is Kevin, and my favourite band ever is Muse.” “Hi, my name is Kevin, and I love finger-painting.” The funny thing about allowing myself to just be me is that all those boring people stopped wanting to hang out with me because I was not safe.
The people who stuck around were awesome. We hiked, we swam, we practised martial arts together. We could discuss anything from black holes to stand-up comedians, from Wittgenstein to Winnie the Pooh, and all the while we were laughing. I reminded myself that I would never have my true friends if I was not willing to be rejected by everybody else.
When I graduated college, I was ready to enter the real world. I had learned to let go of the safety of conformity, and I was ready to meet other self-actualised adults. It turned out to be the same introduction from college, only now with a suit or, more often, a name tag: “Hello, my name is meaningless, and I am my job.”
I am proud of my job and privileged to earn my living by raising money for the symphony, but when I was nine, I never said, “Hi, my name is Kevin, and when I grow up, I want to be a grant writer.” Even today, there are things I am far more passionate about than mailing out project budgets and annual reports. Passion is what this is really about.
So many people have passions and badly want to share them with the world, but they do not because they fear criticism from people they do not care about. I will talk about my passion with anybody: a crowd at a party, the woman in line at the grocery store, or a stranger in the back of the room. If some stranger does not think old kung fu movies are awesome, so what?
I am probably never going to see them again, and it does not make me love them any less. But if that person is totally into “The 36th Chamber of Shaolin,” then I have just made a new best friend. So no matter what, I win, and so can you. The ultimate question is: how do you introduce yourself?
You know me pretty well by now, but I had eight minutes to tell you who I am. How do you convey all of that in a single sentence? That is something you have to figure out for yourself, and I challenge you to do it. Allow me to close with my introduction: “Hello, my name is Kevin Bahler, and I love it when people are truly happy.”
⚡ Learning goals & ✨ Key language
⚡ Learning goals
- Talk about yourself in a more honest and meaningful way.
- Contrast “safe” introductions with authentic, passion-based introductions.
- Explain why sharing your real interests helps you find true friends.
✨ Key language
- safe introduction “I mastered the safe introduction.”
- fit in “You need to fit in to survive high school.”
- be yourself “Allowing myself to just be me changed everything.”
⚙️ Rules & Grammar — 4 Structures
⚙️ Rules & Grammar — 4 Structures
1️⃣ Present simple for identity and habits
Rule: Use the present simple to talk about who you are and what you usually do.
Examples: I am the grant writer for the symphony; I love finger-painting; I talk about my passion with anybody.
Common pitfall + fix: Learners often use the present continuous (“I am loving finger-painting”) for general likes. Use the present simple instead (“I love finger-painting”).
Choose the best sentence about a general habit.
Tip: For general truths and habits, use the present simple, not the continuous.
Fill with the best answer: ______ about my passions with anybody.
Tip: Begin with “I” and use the present simple form of “talk”.
2️⃣ Used to for past habits
Rule: Use “used to” to describe habits or states that were true in the past but are not true now.
Examples: I used to pick the safer options; I used to master the safe introduction; I used to complain about homework with my friends.
Common pitfall + fix: Learners sometimes say “I use to” without “d”. Always write “used to” for past habits.
Which sentence correctly describes a past habit?
Tip: Remember the “d” in “used to” when you talk about old habits.
Fill with the best answer: I ______ when I was in high school.
Tip: Use “used to” and a verb phrase connected to fitting in.
3️⃣ First conditional for real consequences
Rule: Use “if” + present simple and “will” to talk about real future results or consequences.
Examples: If you want to fit in, you need to have something in common; If you stop being safe, you will find true friends; If a stranger loves kung fu movies, you will make a new friend.
Common pitfall + fix: Learners sometimes use “would” instead of “will” in real situations. Use “will” for realistic future results.
Choose the correct first conditional sentence.
Tip: First conditional uses “if” + present simple and “will” + base verb.
Fill with the best answer: If you never take risks, ______.
Tip: Complete the idea with “you will …” and something about true friends.
4️⃣ Modal verbs for advice and possibility
Rule: Use modal verbs like “can”, “should”, and “might” to give advice, show possibility or permission.
Examples: You can talk about your passion with anybody; You should stop caring about fitting in; You might lose boring friends but gain amazing ones.
Common pitfall + fix: Learners often add “to” after a modal (“should to be honest”). The base verb should not take “to”.
Which sentence gives good advice with a modal verb?
Tip: After a modal verb, use the base form of the verb without “to”.
Fill with the best answer: You ______.
Tip: Begin with a modal verb from the talk (for example, “can”) and continue with a positive message.
✍️ Vocabulary
✍️ Vocabulary
introduction
Meaning: the way you present yourself to other people at the beginning of a conversation.
Synonyms: presentation, opening, beginning, self-description.
Chunk/Idiom: give a safe introduction.
Example: He mastered the safe introduction at college and used it with everyone.
Morphology: noun; countable; related verb “introduce”.
Self-practice: Write two sentences that show different introductions you can give.
passion
Meaning: a strong feeling of enthusiasm or love for an activity, idea or thing.
Synonyms: enthusiasm, excitement, obsession, strong interest.
Chunk/Idiom: talk about your passion with anybody.
Example: He talks about his passion for old kung fu movies with anyone who will listen.
Morphology: noun; uncountable or countable; related adjective “passionate”.
Self-practice: List three passions you would like to share more openly.
conformity
Meaning: behaviour that follows the usual rules or expectations of a group or society.
Synonyms: obedience, compliance, conventionality, social agreement.
Chunk/Idiom: the safety of conformity.
Example: Letting go of the safety of conformity helped him find real friends.
Morphology: noun; uncountable; related verb “conform”.
Self-practice: Describe a situation where conformity stopped you from being honest.
rejection
Meaning: the act of not accepting or approving someone or something.
Synonyms: refusal, denial, exclusion, dismissal.
Chunk/Idiom: be willing to face rejection.
Example: He knew he might face rejection when he stopped using safe introductions.
Morphology: noun; countable or uncountable; related verb “reject”.
Self-practice: Write one sentence about a time you risked rejection to be yourself.
authentic
Meaning: real, true and honest, not fake or copied.
Synonyms: genuine, real, honest, true.
Chunk/Idiom: give an authentic introduction.
Example: An authentic introduction shows what you truly care about in life.
Morphology: adjective; related noun “authenticity”.
Self-practice: Change one of your usual introductions to make it more authentic.
self-acceptance
Meaning: the practice of recognising and being comfortable with who you really are.
Synonyms: self-respect, self-love, self-approval, inner peace.
Chunk/Idiom: learn self-acceptance instead of only trying to fit in.
Example: True friends made self-acceptance easier because they liked his honest self.
Morphology: noun; uncountable; built from “self” + noun “acceptance”.
Self-practice: Write a sentence that shows self-acceptance in your own life.
☁️ Examples (+ audio)
☁️ Examples (+ audio)
I used to give very safe introductions. Now I share my real passions with people. If you are honest, you will find true friends. You should not be afraid of rejection.
✏️ Exercises
✏️ Exercises
Grammar
Which sentence correctly uses “used to”?
Tip: Remember that “used to” describes an old habit that is not true now.
Choose the correct first conditional sentence.
Tip: First conditional uses “if” + present simple and “will” + base verb.
Fill with the best answer:
I love it when people ______.
Tip: Use the phrase Kevin uses at the end of his talk.
Fill with the best answer:
I am not afraid to ______.
Tip: Use the structure “talk about my passion with …”.
Vocabulary & Comprehension
Which word means a strong feeling of enthusiasm for something?
Tip: Think about what Kevin shares when he talks about old kung fu movies.
What was Kevin’s turning point in the talk?
Tip: Look for the moment where he changes from safe to honest.
Fill with the best answer:
Kevin discovered that ______.
Tip: Use his exact words about the kind of friends he had.
Fill with the best answer:
Without risking rejection, he would ______.
Tip: Think about what he says he would never have without that risk.
✅ Guided practice
✅ Guided practice
Mini-dialogue:
A: Hi, I am Kevin, and I love old kung fu movies and finger-painting.
B: That is awesome, I am into martial arts and strange hobbies too.
A: Great, then we can skip the safe introductions and be ourselves.
Why this matters:
Honest introductions help you find people who truly share your passions. Safe introductions may protect you from criticism, but they also hide the best parts of you. Taking small risks with what you share can transform boring connections into real friendships.
Verb & Adjective Pack:
be honest — Try to be honest when you say who you are.
fit in — He tried to fit in by talking about normal interests.
risk rejection — You sometimes risk rejection when you share your true passions.
authentic — An authentic introduction shows what you really care about.
passionate — Passionate people are fun to talk to about any topic.
Try & compare:
Fill with the best answer: Do not be afraid to ______.
Tip: Use a phrase with “share your passions”.
Self-correction: Fix the sentence: Hello, my name is Anna and I is love write science fictions.
Tip: Copy Kevin’s style: clear present simple, natural word order and no extra “s”.
Practice aloud: Listen, repeat, then type the sentence.
Hello, my name is Kevin, and I love it when people are truly happy.
Tip: Focus on connected speech between “people” and “are truly happy”.